Last week I completed Jillian Michaels’ 30 Day Shred for the second time in my life.
I know, I know, I promised myself I would never work out again after the first time I completed that DVD series.
But then I saw this:
This meme hit close to home.
I was laying in my bathtub and I noticed that I was uncomfortable…like I was choking on all the chins resting on my throat…choking on my own fat face.
I shot right up in the bathtub to try to see it for myself in the mirror.
I sank back down and tried to retrace my steps…
Eat whatever you want. Check. Never exercise. Check.
Yes. I blame the holidays. Food everywhere.
There’s always food everywhere.
Yeah but, I need a lot of comforting because, you know…it’s the holidays…
So now that the holidays are over, I am left with this fat face. Great. My brain started to buzz formulating a fantasy plastic surgery plan. This surely must be the perfect time for one of those tummy tuck things.
Oh right, it’s my fat face that’s the problem…crap.
Are you even allowed to talk to yourself like this?
Stop calling me fat face.
What is going on?!
Holidays. Winter holidays are like a recipe for The Shining regardless of your geographic location.
Seriously, everyone acts insane for the winter holidays; you can count on it. That’s why everyone joins the gym right after New Years, so they can physically remove the insanity from their bodies.
Enter Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred DVD. I don’t like to go to the gym. I feel extremely uncomfortable when I sweat and am out of breath; I don’t want an audience in that moment. My post work out face is super red and blotchy.
I know the Shred works because I did it every day for 30 consecutive days in 2012 after my son was born and within 45 days AFTER the workout was complete, the 75 pounds I gained with my pregnancy was gone. GONE!
That felt good because working out for 30 days in a row with a 200+ pound body felt disgusting. My pregnancy boobs were still an H cup, so the cardio was painful. When I would do mountain climbers, my stomach would bounce off of the top of my thighs and huge boobs (and then my huge boobs would slap my fat face) in a shameful manner. Slapping noises. Gross. Sweaty. Red face.
I hated every minute of it. My skin would get all prickly, covered in goose bumps because I was slightly afraid to even do the workout. When I finished it the first time and was still 200 pounds, I thought I might be living in a nightmare. When the weight started to fall off immediately the day after the series ended, I thought I might be living in a dream; a well deserved dream world where I love my body.
I do love my body. I hug myself everyday. I am proud that my body made a human being. I am proud to have my body back. I allowed myself almost a 3 year break from formal exercise–that’s insane!
This time around, my second Shred experience was different. I was still very sweaty and red in the face. I still dreaded the workout every day. But I did not have fear inside of me; there were no goosebumps. I knew I could do it and I did it well. I even brought my 3 pound weights and the DVD with me and worked out on vacation for 4 days, which is unheard of for me!
This time, I saw results during the 30-day Shred series. For example, I bought this dress that I thought was a size 8 and I couldn’t button it up during week one of the Shred. That’s ok, I told myself, put it back in the closet and you will be able to wear it when you’re done with the series. Well, I wanted to wear that dress BEFORE my 30 days was over, during the third week, and guess what?! It fit. Guess what else?! I read the tag wrong, that dress did not say “8” it said “S” for SMALL.
My body is back. I did it!
But I am not done. I decided to give myself 4 days off and then I began a new Jillian Michael’s DVD called “Killer Abs.” I don’t know if anyone will get killed with my abs, but I’m apparently taking that risk.
Wish me luck!