History indicates Martin Luther King Doesn’t Want Women to Wait


History repeats. In honor of Martin Luther King, I tell this highly controversial story that has been stuck inside of me for about 8 years and is inspired by this quote:


“It may well be that we will have to repent in this generation. Not merely for the vitriolic words and the violent actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence and indifference of the good people who sit around and say, “Wait on time.”

~Martin Luther King


Are you aware that history repeats itself?


It sure does. History is a course of study so that we can either replicate or avoid certain events in the future.


Here is an example:


The women’s suffrage movement was delayed by 53 years because the suffragettes were successfully divided by a separate movement to win the right to vote for black men. Unfortunately, women were not in a position to win both rights and their decision to support black men adversely impacted their own chances at freedom because black men never bothered to reciprocate or use their new found freedom to turn around and help women earn the right to vote.


White men were in a better position to hold onto their power by completely controlling the system of government that allowed only men to vote. Women were not a part of this system and had no ability to thwart Jim Crow laws or to call out any of the racism that was used to slow down the impact of the 15th amendment. Once black men “won” the right to vote, momentum for women’s right to vote stopped.


Essentially, women had to start over and win the right to vote all on their own. There was no significant group of white men or black men who joined the effort to win women the right to vote, there was never reciprocity or gratitude for the altruistic efforts of women to win black men the right to vote, and that is why it took 53 more years for women to be allowed to vote via the 19th amendment.


History repeated in 2008.


The Democrats had 2 choices to consider backing for President. There was one white woman who had more experience than anyone. There was one black man who had less experience than anyone. There was a lot of posturing about how the Democrats needed to win this time and about how Republicans would be more upset about a first-time woman president than a first-time black man president.


Yes—that is how successful the white male movement of 1776 has been. It took until 1865 for black men to win the right to vote and until 1920 for women to join in on the freedom. So yes, by 2008 we are all still walking on eggshells about which one of us non-white-men will piss off the Republicans the least, as a political strategy. Should women support women this time? Is that even safe?


Needless to say, women were more than happy to step aside and let the less-experienced black man take her place in line. So happy for you! Because we are democrats and we are a team, right? It’s not about experience, skill or merit when it comes to man versus woman, we women totally get that. We know how disgusting you think it is for us to vote for someone “just because” they are a woman, as though being represented in government is not something to strive for.


I know how disgusting it is for me to begrudge America the experience of a black first family. It’s like being mad at the new hire for getting promoted before you; you can see he’s doing a great job, but it is still unfair that he didn’t put in his dues. And that unfair promotion has a ripple effect.


Because who cares that history tells us it will now take 53 more years for America to experience their first woman President. “No taxation without representation” is a sassy phrase that only applies to white men; it’s not a real call to action that has aaaaaaaaanything to do with a REVOLUTION.


Revolution? For What? Because Planned Parenthood is being defunded? Because our President Elect brags about abusing his power to sexually assault women? Because sexual assault is not something white men are criminalized for perpetrating? Because white men remain in charge of women’s healthcare? Because of the pay gap?


“It may well be that we will have to repent in this generation. Not merely for the vitriolic words and the violent actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence and indifference of the good people who sit around and say, ‘Wait on time.’”

~Dr. Martin Luther King


Thank you, Dr. Martin Luther King, I needed a man to tell me what I already knew to be true: telling me to wait is a subversive form of discrimination. In the 8 years I’ve been waiting to be represented in government by a black man, I’ve decided that it does actually need to be a woman president in order for valid representation.


I wish history didn’t repeat itself in this case. I wish that I could tell you after 8 years of Obama that all the black men turned around and supported the most experienced female candidate in the history of America. After all, that same woman, and all the women who supported her, set their needs aside to support the black man because it was the right thing to do. Would it not now be the right thing to do to reciprocate?


No. That’s not even close to what happened. Name a time when men voted against their own interests. Name a time when women voted in their own interests. Men know what it’s like to be represented by their own gender. Women don’t. History repeats.


After 8 years of waiting, I’m done. I’m breaking the cycle. I support you men and I’ve proven that. Watch me support me now. I don’t want white men deciding what to do with organs they don’t even have in their own body. I release you men of that burden forever. The war on women has to stop now. There has to be a point where I grow up and am adult enough to admit I know more about my body than a dude.


I don’t want to pretend men know better than me about me anymore.


All that ended in November 2016.


2017 is all about direct action.


“You may well ask: “Why direct action? Why sit-ins, marches and so forth? Isn’t negotiation a better path?” You are quite right in calling for negotiation. Indeed, this is the very purpose of direct action. Nonviolent direct action seeks to create such a crisis and foster such a tension that a community which has constantly refused to negotiate is forced to confront the issue.”

Martin Luther King Jr., Why We Can’t Wait

Nonviolent direct action.

History repeats

For me right now, that means produce, direct and star in a play. Maya Angelou and Eve Ensler are my idols because they use theatre for social change. I want violence against women to end and I’m not afraid to put on a charitable play to demonstrate that.


If you’re in the Las Vegas area on Saturday February 4, 2017 at 7:00 p.m., check out the V-Day 2017 production of The Vagina Monologues at the Summerlin Library Performing Arts Center; all proceeds benefit Refuge for Women Las Vegas, an aftercare program for the trafficked and sexually exploited.


History repeats

Martin Luther King, Jr


I’m done making things more comfortable for you guys. This is a time for growth and growth is necessarily painful. Growing pains begin with discomfort. Get uncomfortable. Decide to have a conversation with the man in the mirror and ask him to change his ways.


Altruism is the belief in or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others.


If you do not have an altruistic bone in your body, you’re not a leadership candidate; you can’t be trusted to put the needs of the group ahead of your own. Stop talking about “the way it should be” and start looking deep within yourself for a shred of altruism. The reason women historically keep putting others above their own needs is because it’s the right thing to do–even if the efforts are never reciprocated–because we are the models demonstrating with our lives how to treat each other. That’s right, children, women are the mothers and we are asking you all to grow up now. Pay it forward.



The State of The Union: altruism be damned

Altruism, or selflessness, is the principle or practice of concern for or devotion to the welfare of others (as opposed to egoism).


Remember last winter?


I do.


So long. So dark. So full of despair.


I spent a lot of time sobbing in the bathtub thinking about Whitney and Bobbi Christina last winter. Unable to see the light. Wondering how it could possibly be that I am still fucking here. How am I still alive?


On one of these days in early January 2016, I came across a story about a woman named Baba Vanga. Through tear-stained glasses and swollen eyes, while scrolling through FaceBook on my phone, I saw a face that made me stop crying:


baba vanga




In reading the article, I learned that Baba Vanga was a blind Bulgarian clairvoyant who has an 85% success rate with her predictions that include the attacks of 9/11, the Boxing Day Tsunami of 2004 and the concept of Global Warming.


The article actually scared the shit out of me because Baba Vanga predicted that by the end of 2016, Europe will cease to exist.


No way!!!!! I love Europe! I studied abroad in Law School at the University of Amsterdam in 2004 and got the opportunity to visit both Paris and Germany. I got to go inside Anne Frank’s secret annex!




Why in the world would Europe ever cease to exist? How???


Well, perhaps this prediction from Baba Vanga is related: our 44th president will be our first African American President and our last President. Ever.


Why in the world would America not have a 45th president? How???


I began to read every article ever printed online about Baba Vanga. I had to know everything. How did she go blind. Who was her family. What was her upbringing like? Why and under what circumstances did she make these predictions?


Baba Vanga died in 1996. It is always my first guess that the people who are able to report what they can “see” about the future are trying to help. I hoped that because of Baba Vanga having the ability to be heard, with her predictions in print and circulating the internet, that this would equate to mass numbers of people working toward making those predictions an impossibility.


That hope was shattered less than 6 months later when I woke up to Brexit, which I immediately understood to be exactly how Europe ceasing to exist will begin. As of July 2016, the prediction is that QUITaly will be next. For the record: I find these mashups highly offensive. Exiting Europe, quitting Europe–haven’t y’all heard about Baba Vanga predicting Europe will cease to exist at the end of 2016 OR ARE YOU CAPITALIZING ON IT?




Thanks to People Magazine, I was able to piece together how it could possibly be that both Europe could cease to exist and America could have no future presidents around the same exact time.


Trump and this British Trump are too a-holes in a pod.


Something about the fact that they both exist at the same time… It was at this moment that I knew this is the way things were supposed to be. That Baba Vanga wasn’t necessarily telling us so that we could stop it, she was telling us so that the people watching it could understand that this is part of our journey.


Does it mean we give up?




Does it mean we can stop it?


I don’t know.


That’s not the point. I am not an opportunist, I am a humanist. Like I have already told you, we are here on this Earth to learn lessons and grow, a pain/pleasure cycle that ends with a life review you are held personally accountable for.


What happened with Wikileaks revealing the democratic party “favored Hillary Clinton and worked behind the scenes to discredit and defeat Bernie Sanders,” is the catalyst for change. For as long as I have been alive, it has been a given that politicians are “crooked,” unethical, self serving hypocrites and that “the voice of the people” cannot truly be heard as a result.


My little girl brain always made sure to stay involved in politics as a result of that given. I have always been active in student government, from grade school to law school. I am familiar with Robert’s Rules of Order. I am the president of the PTO at my son’s preschool. I am a whistleblower.


When I was 12 years old I thought it was pretty bad ass that the First Lady was working towards universal healthcare. The media was reporting it as a bad thing, I could hear that clearly and was struck by the message: the first lady is not supposed to be this involved. It was not about Hillary Clinton’s competence, it was about her being seen AND heard at the same time, which was clearly distasteful to most. Not to me, though. What’s the point of even having a brain if you’re not going to use it?


While Michelle Obama made her amazing speech at the DNC last night, people were already making memes out of her, declaring: Michelle Obama for president!


That really ticks me off. I don’t think people understand that they have the luxury of saying, “Michelle Obama for president,” BECAUSE Michelle Obama purposefully intended to be a “traditional First Lady” who is not involved in politics. Had First Lady Michelle Obama been as active as First Lady Hillary Clinton, using her amazing lawyer brain to actively pursue political goals, America really wouldn’t be able to give two shits about who Michelle Obama wants us to vote for because she would then be guilty of the worst offense: being a woman with an opinion.


I remember when Hillary lost the primary to Obama. I was devastated. I felt cheated. I didn’t understand how someone with more experience could lose to someone so green. It didn’t seem fair. I wish that wikileaks could go back through the 2008 emails and reveal the way in which the democratic party favored Obama over Hillary because we all have to know that this was not the first time that has happened. What has been revealed, is actually the practice and not the exception, in my opinion.


So here’s the deal: political parties are just like insurance companies. They want your money, they want your vote and they want your allegiance, but they do not want to give you anything in return such as honesty, integrity or value. Seriously. This is the nature of winning and losing. The only thing the “party” wants to do is “beat” the other “party.” That’s fucken weird.


This is the part where I wake up and realize I knew this was coming long before Baba Vanga told me. I’m talking about it in the very first blog I ever wrote (click here) which is published almost exactly one year before the article I read on Baba Vanga was published. I’m talking about it in the YouTube video I made almost exactly 2 years ago to the day (click here). I’ve been talking about a revolution for years.




Absence of matriarchy.


What does that mean?


Thank you for asking.


noun: matriarchy; plural noun: matriarchies

A  system of society or government ruled by a woman or women.
A form of social organization in which descent and relationship are reckoned through the female line.
The state of being an older, powerful woman in a family or group.
“she cherished a dream of matriarchy—catered to by grandchildren”


Interesting. Compare that to the definition for patriarchy:


noun: patriarchy;  plural noun: patriarchies
A system of society or government in which the father or eldest male is head of the family and descent is traced through the male line.
A system of society or government in which men hold the power and women are largely excluded from it.
A society or community organized on patriarchal lines.


Ok, how can I explain this…


You know that old expression: all women are crazy and all men are assholes.


What if assholes have been exclusively in charge forever and it has driven us all crazy.


When I was in Law School the Constitutional Law books looked like this:


women are {can own} property.


Law school books are like that because part of a legal education includes an understanding of what the law was, what the law is now and everything that happened in between. If you have been through law school, then you know why Bill Cosby has not been indicted for serial rape and you know why Brock Turner only got 6 months as a convicted rapist. Our laws are based on what men think is fair for men.


Absence of matriarchy.




Oppressing an entire gender has not worked out. There is no way to fix a system that purposefully excluded an entire gender absent scrapping that shit system and starting over. Baba Vanga shared her visions so that we could know things don’t always stay the same. Life is cyclical.


Does the idea of no more Europe and no more presidential leader frighten me?


Hell yes.


But I have PTSD, so I deal with fear on a very regular basis and continue to face everything and rise. For me, fear will never trump justice. I am brave. I have always been prepared to go down fighting the good fight. I run from nothing. I believe in love, honesty, integrity, caring, compassion, strength, loyalty and kindness. These are my life values.


You know how Mister Rogers’ mom was all, look for the helpers?




Well I’m a mom, too, and this is what’s going down in my house: BE A HELPER. Look for the helpers so you can join them in CARING TO BE HELPFUL. You have to care.






PS: Baba Vanga also predicted that hunger would be eradicated between 2025 and 2028, I plan to be a major part of that effort. We have more than enough food, there is no reason for children to die of starvation. We can all be helpers.